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Conflicting emotions

As a mom I have many conflicting emotions.

I love going to work because it's usually a "break" I'm guaranteed 5 days a week at the same time I feel bad I'm not there to take care of my son.

I get frustrated and upset at how hard it really is to be a mom and how much self sacrifice it takes and at the same time I feel bad for complaining because I am lucky enough to have a baby when many women aren't. I also feel like I'm being selfish every time I bitch about how hard it is.

I feel upset when I don't think my husband understands how hard it is but at the same time I appreciate what he does to make my life easier and his attempts to make things go smoothly for me at times.

I feel guilty if I get frustrated and upset that my son might end up feeling some of my anxiety while I'm trying to do my best to care for him and get both of us where we need to be at times.

I'm also constantly worrying about being a good mother to him. 

What conflicting emotions do you have as a mother? Feel free to comment under my entry if  you wish.

Maverick last night playing with my father's old baby rattle

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